Goodbye to measuring coffee creamer

Happy Thursday fighters,

I know this post comes at a random time, but I had such a hello life moment this morning, I had to share it with you all.

I was making my coffee this morning when I realized that my one tablespoon measuring spoon I use to measure my exact one table spoon of coffee creamer each morning was gone.

If you guys remember, in my post about taking myself out for breakfast last month, I wrote about how I’ve transitioned coffee creamer back into my life since I started recovery two years ago.

First, I started with sugar free coffee creamer and measured a tiny teaspoon of it. Then I moved to fat free creamer and used a tiny teaspoon to measure. Then I moved to one tablespoon of fat free creamer and for the past six months I worked my way up to using a tablespoon of real kind, full everything, creamer.

On weekends, I used to let myself not measure it out because it was a weekend and I wanted that freedom.

I knew I wanted to eventually stop measuring my coffee creamer, but I didn’t know when or how I would stop.

So this morning, when my measuring spoon was magically gone, I just had this innate feeling this was the time.

In the past few days, I’ve done a huge spring cleaning of my house and I honestly don’t remember touching the one tablespoon measuring spoon, but somehow, I believe it was meant to find its way out of my home. (And if I do ever happen to find it, I will make sure to throw it away.)

I thought to myself, ok Shira, you can just go buy a new one tablespoon measuring spoon tomorrow and just not have coffee today.

Then I thought, or, you can just not measure it today, have it, and then buy a new measuring tool tomorrow.

And then I thought, or, this is a sign that the time has come to ditch measuring your coffee creamer.

So here, I am, about 10 minutes after finishing my coffee with creamer that I did not measure, and I feel so free and victorious that I had to share it with you all.

I don’t feel guilty-I feel a little nervous, yes, but not guilty.

Ed does not win today and forever more, in terms of coffee creamer, he’ll never win again.

I’m not ashamed to say it took me two years to stop measuring my coffee creamer.

And I’m not ashamed it took my measuring spoon miraculously disappearing out of my house to make me stop measuring it.

I’m proud I never gave up my vision that I one day, wanted to break that food rule forever.

And today I did that.

On another note, all 5 of my brothers and sisters are on their way to Washington today from California to see my new home and have a late celebration for celebrating two years without a scale.

It’s kind of crazy how things happen to work together in that way.

My family is coming to celebrate Hello Life with me on the same day that my coffee creamer measuring spoon disappears.

Now, when my little brothers have hot chocolate tomorrow morning and I have coffee, they won’t have to see me measuring anything in front of them.

The thought of that alone almost makes me cry I’m so excited to show them that.

Good bye one tablespoon measuring device thing that I will not repurchase and throw away if you ever do somehow show up again.

Hello life.

Advertisements

18 thoughts on “Goodbye to measuring coffee creamer

  1. WOW! What a fantastic achievement, I hope I’ll be able to do the same one day with pasta and oats, you keep me going and I have made a 0.5 kg weight gain today and keep building on it. Thank you all for keeping Hello Life going it really is the support I need.

    Miss Naomi Milsom
    York, UK

    ________________________________

    • Thank you so much Naomi and thank you so much for your support and love. It truly is so amazing and special. That’s so incredible about the 0.5 k gain! Keep doing you, keep pushing for loving you for you, keep pushing for freedom from Ed and I know one day i am going to get an email from you and it will say “i did it. i didn’t measure my pasta or oats.” Your a true fighter.

      Love,
      Shira

  2. Awesome! Don’t feel in the least silly or alone, I think we all have those things going on….mine was a bowl. This one bowl, that I would only eat dinner out of. Heaven forbid if I had to eat off an actual plate, it was like the world was ending! All these years later, I actually still have the bowl….and I must admit it’s still my favourite bowl to eat dinner out of. BUT if we are having a meal that a “normal” person would eat on a full dinner plate, then I make sure I have mine on a plate too, and it’s no longer an issue. Small victories, right?! xoxo

    • Thank you so much! That’s a huge victory!! I think thats amazing that you can now use a plate if you need to and that you still have the bowl but that its YOUR favorite, not Ed’s. Thats so beautiful to me. Thank you for sharing and keep doing what your doing. Thank you for being a part of this journey ❤

      Love,
      Shira

  3. That’s awesome! I’m the same way, I have three little sisters and I’m so proud when I can stop measuring things in front of them even though it makes me nervous. I promise it gets easier every time. Congratulations 🙂

  4. I cried when I read this because this is ME! I am 4 months and 2 days in recovery from a 20 year battle with all sorts of disordered eating behaviors and I’ve struggled with breaking up with my tablespoon. The tablespoon reared his ugly head yesterday but not today! TODAY I chose to LOVE myself and watch the miracles unfold all while enjoying a cup of coffee WITH regular awesome tasting non measured creamer!!!!!!!!!!! ;-).

    • Hi Jamie ! Oh my gosh this just made my day ! First , congratulations on your recovery . That is so truly amazing ! And major congrats on not using your tablespoon today !!!! Just take in every moment of freedom and let it over ride the fear and anxiety . Sending you love and strength and hope , Shira

  5. OMG I do the same thing still even now 2 years into recovery! Thank you for posting this! I need to throw away my table spoon!!lol

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s