Day 320: Today Was All Me

Hello everyone,

I am going out to dinner for my grandma’s 75th birthday tonight to a steak house. Knowing this was going to take place about a week ago, I had totally planned to workout today.

I mean, it was just a given. I am going to eat dinner at a steakhouse, and therefore, I must workout that day, right?

Well, to no surprise, as this is a lesson I keep learning over and over, just how I woke up earlier this week to go to the gym at 6 am and then realized it was not worth it, the same thing kind of happened today and my so called “plans” were no longer so planned.

I knew I only had a few hours to get things done today before I had to get ready for the dinner and there wasn’t space for both working out and writing my last cover story for my university newspaper. There was only room for one.

I will be honest and say that this was probably one of the easiest decisions I’ve ever made in all of my recovery.

Ed versus the best story I will ever write in my entire life.

There was no hesitation.

Ed lost immediatly.

While at one time, Ed would have 100% completely won because at that time, he would have been the center of my universe and reaching that number on a scale would be all that I would have based my self worth on that day, today he was nothing.

I would much rather produce the best story I ever wrote than lose a few calories at the gym.

So that’s exactly what I did.

Come Tuesday when this story runs, there will be no traces of Ed anywhere around it.

This is all me; my brain, my mind, my talent and my skills as a writer, all of which Ed gets in the way of if I restrict and value myself on a number of calories or size or weight.

There are parts of my life where Ed is still a big part of; major parts of it ,and I don’t’ deny that.

But when it comes to writing, it’s all me.

Today was all me, not Ed.

Hello life.

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