Day 264: But Ed, It Was A S’mores Cheesecake!

Hi guys,

Last night, for the first time ever, I ordered a s’mores cheesecake. (It was the newest cheesecake added to the menu at Cheesecake Factory, my favorite restaurant).

Now, I don’t even like cheesecake-not because of Ed reasons, but because I just don’t like it. But last night, I just needed to try it because I love s’mores.

Well, not only did I try it, but I loved it, and I ate almost all of it, which leads me to the result that always happens when I eat anything with a lot of salt or sugar: body soreness.

Oh…my dear body soreness. I could honestly write an entire blog about my experience with this body soreness in recovery. It happened to me last Friday and last Saturday too , both times because I ate food with either salt or sugar.

So, of course, I spent today with Ed telling me to be “careful” or what I eat today (in Ed’s world, meaning to restrict), since I ate that s’mores cheesecake last night,.

And as if Ed talking to me isn’t already draining enough, I have the physical discomfort in my body to constantly remind me of it.

Sometimes on days like today, I let Ed win. Sometimes, I do listen.

But today, I was just so annoyed of him already.

I literally kept telling him over and over “But Ed, it was a s’mores cheesecake!”

I don’t know why I keep thinking that Ed would care that the fact that it was the coolest cheesecake in the world would justify me eating it, because to him, it doesn’t, but it does justify it for me.

I was telling one of my friends today about how my body was sore , and he said, well, at least the cheesecake had vitamins H and T.

Vitamins H and T? I had never heard of that. I’ve heard of vitamin A, D, C, but never H and T.

“Yeah, it stands for happiness and taste,” he said.

I just loved that statement so much that I had to write about it, because it goes along with what I’ve been telling Ed all day.

It wasn’t anything more than the most delicious cheesecake, filled with Vitamin’s H and T-happiness and taste.

I am not saying that our happiness should come from food all the time-but sometimes, and especially with desserts and for those of us in recovery for eating disorders, happiness from food every now and then is allowed I think.

So regardless of my soreness, I am still having my friends over for dinner tonight (and yup, with more cheesecake), and if Ed continues to bother me I am going to keep saying the same thing:

“But Ed, it was a s’mores cheesecake!.”

Can’t that just be enough of a reason to overlook the body soreness and move on with my day?

I think so.

Hello life.


6 thoughts on “Day 264: But Ed, It Was A S’mores Cheesecake!

  1. Way to go! My current desert love is ice cream, I need to re-stock every couple days! It feels good to let go and live, doesn’t it? Keep up the good work! 🙂

    • S’mores cheesecake? Challenge time come at me!

      I really just wanted to say that Vitamins H & T are priceless. I have got to tell some others about them, if that’s alright!

      • Hi Jordan! Of course it’s alright!! I hope the whole world would know about vitamins H and T-we all could use some in our daily lives. I am so happy to hear that it had such a positive affect on someone like it did on me. Thank you so much for this comment and I can’t wait to hear about how others you share it with like it =)

    • I am so happy I read this comment right now, because I really needed to see it. It was a good reminder to me of how good it does feel to let go and live, even when it’s hard to do sometimes. You go girl ! I love the fact that you re-stock your ice cream every couple of days!!! That is truly awesome and it makes me smile for you! I can only imagine all the freedom that it must bring you. Your amazing! Thank you for sharing!

  2. Omg! I stumbled across your website while googling positive recovery blogs.
    I am SO happy I did!
    It is kind of ironic- I just experienced a similar event last night.
    My best friend made a s’mores dip. I had some along with all of my other friends and my gosh it was amazing.
    But my disorder voice was SO loud the next day, telling me to “be careful” and I’ve been struggling with this alllll day. But everything you’re writing here is so true.
    I was so happy that night that I tried some and enjoyed it with my friends.
    I was sooo happy that my disorder didn’t control that moment!
    And thats all that matters!
    Love your blog! Stay strong & positive! :))

    • Hi Marjorie,

      Thank you so much for this comment!!! Isn’t it so crazy how we can all experience the same thing at the same moments sometimes? I am so glad that you were able to enjoy the s’mores dip with your friends and that you were in control of that moment!!! Hearing that truly uplifts me and makes me smile. Thank you for such positive energy and thank you for sharing your experience with me, it truly brightened my day!

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