Day 105: Opening New Doors

Good afternoon everyone,

I saw a quote yesterday,and it said:

“Until God opens the next door for you, praise him in the hallway.”

This struck me and I thought about it all day-even as I was doing my shopping for my new clothes.

Latley, I was been in a place where I feel I have been waiting around in different hallways waiting for new doors to open for me.

I was waiting for the door to a  new internship I’ve been waiting to hear from open, I was waiting for the door to finally feel good in my clothes to open, and I was waiting for the door to meet new people and have them not judge me as a girl with an eating disorder to open.

By taking my blog off of Facebook, I feel I already have opened the door to meeting new people and to not letting them judge me based on this blog.

But what about the other two doors I’ve been waiting for? The one about my hopeful internship and the one about feeling good about my body and the way I feel in my clothes?

I do believe in God, and I do have faith in him even in the hallways, but I am not waiting for him anymore to open these doors for me-it’s time I walk through the hallways and begin to open my own doors.

Yesterday, by going shopping for new clothes so I can replace my old unhealthy clothes, was me opening a new door for myself.

I opened a new door to my recovery and I cracked open the door to beginning to accept my body for what it is right now.

I also need to start opening the door to new opportunities other than just waiting around for this internship. I have a few options that I am going to look into, but I’m ready to open my eyes to see what else is out there.

Being stuck in these hallways of the unknown is not always a bad thing or a bad place to be, and I actually sometimes enjoy the walk to the next door coming my way.

I don’t even think I want to open all these new doors at once; maybe I can take my time and open them one knob at a time.

But most importantly, I love the fact that I am the one doing the walking and I am the one opening the doors for myself. No more waiting for recovery, or even for life, to catch up to where I want to be.

Maybe I’m rushing ? Maybe I am playing with destiny or fate by trying to open new doors for myself?

But something inside of me is telling me I need to push myself right now, so I am going to listen to that.

The best part is, Ed is not hiding behind these new doors that I am about to open.

He’s sitting in a corner somewhere in the hallway, just watching me walk along, and I like it like that for now. I hope one day he will locked outside the whole damn building.

Hello to opening new doors for myself and hello life.

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3 thoughts on “Day 105: Opening New Doors

  1. There is a part of me that pushes in a helpful way too. As for my Ed, it softened and transformed..and amazingly added to my strength. Sounds crazy, but we are very powerful when we claim it.
    Blessings to you-
    Laurie

  2. Shira, another great blog. Ed is no match for you. i’m inspired to look for some new doors for myself. Good job!

  3. How wonderful! There is a story and the readers digest version is 2 people are on a roof during a flood and the first man sees a ladder against the house and says we should crawl down but the other man tells him no that’s too risky God will save us. And he says the same thing when a helicopter lowers a ladder to pick them up and again when the flood is so high a raft floats by. The other man gets on the raft and the man waiting for God drowns and at the pearly Gates to Heaven he asks God why he didnt save him to which God replies; “I sent you a ladder, a helicopter and a raft… You have to take some action to help yourself.” If you are in the hallway you will find the doors to open yourself :)).

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